There is no growth without pain.

🌈 1233 – Saturday, 3 August 2024 00:12

London The past few hours felt like an entire day, but after having a large homemade meal with a friend, I feel better. I hadn’t planned on writing tonight, but today was memorable. The most unforgettable moment was just before I sat down to eat.

Here I go again..

Woke up early, very very early, 4:30 first alarm, 4:45 2nd alarm and off the bed at 05:10.. quickly loo, got ready dressed yellow leopard shirt, and black shorts, and left home to get the 1st Bakeerloo line from Picadilly Circus for 5:45, I got there 05:47 and the train arrived at 05:49..

Yesterday late in the afternoon, I had the confirmation to work on the filming set as an extra for a Netlifx series, took the train to Kenton, got off there, walked for about 8 min and got to set, where they had us make up first, then costume, then breakfast at 07:45 and drove us to a set, a running hotel in a film set, it was very good. How I wished I could bring my parents there, that hotel is such a nice place, it’s not very built up, but it was just 2 floors full of greenery and built inside as a ship, Madonna Halley Hotel, it was about 20 min drive from Kenton station..

I would rather own that place and bring my family to come and stay there a few days, not as a hotel but just come and stay for the greenery and the style it is built.

Anyway, we got there, the filming started, the main cast filming and we were there as background, partying on a Greek island, there were about 3 drag queens also on the set, one of them was funny and we had a good laugh.

For lunch, I had chicken with salad and a delicious chocolate sponge cake. I met a couple of really sweet guys, each with different interests and personalities. One of them felt familiar; we both agreed that we knew each other from somewhere but couldn’t pinpoint where. We reminisced about our past work and places we’d been until we laughed and decided we were long-lost siblings. Another person I met said he had seen me before but couldn’t remember where. I think I might have seen him at the Oval gym, but we never spoke.

With another one I had a conversation with one person about the clubs we’ve been to, the parties we’ve attended, and our social activities. Another woman talked about the guys she’s been meeting and the dates she’s had. It was a long day filled with many conversations with lots of people, and the set crew were very friendly, easygoing, and respectful, and the wrap-up time was at 17:00 sharp.

I took the train back home from Kenton to Piccadilly, then climbed seven flights of stairs. I texted a friend and crashed in bed at 19:00 for a 25-minute nap while listening to a motivational YouTube video. When I woke up, I stayed in bed chatting with a friend and dealing with some tantrums for nearly two hours. Then, I received a text from my sister asking why I wasn’t messaging in the family group chat. I had reacted to Dad’s good morning prayer message earlier, but it had been a busy day and week. I often feel unacknowledged when I post in the group, and when you don’t feel respected, you tend to withdraw from those interactions.

A friend I hadn’t seen in at least seven years texted me a couple of months ago to reconnect. The first thing he asked was, “Hi, what do you do?” I didn’t text back. Today, he called again while I was busy and asked, “Hi, how are you?” I said I was fine, and his next question was again, “What do you do?” This time I blurted out, “You fucker, all you want to know is what I do… you just want to compare what I’m doing with what you do and measure who’s big and who’s small. You fucking human nature. You haven’t seen me or met me in 7 years so called mate and all you want to know is what I do.. I said I can’t talk now.. he apologised and we planned to meet today after his shift in central in the afternoon.

All I wanted to do this evening was to come home take a nap, got to the gym and have quick workout and have an early night.

Mood was already off by then, so I pushed myself to leave home to get to the gym, surprisingly, I had a good workout, did 4 sets of 10 reps of pull-ups, shoulder presses, front raises, and lateral raises, and had a decent shower since the shower is off past few days, then went to Tesco before it shuts down, it was already 10:30 by then, got home, was hangry by then, angry and hungry made to hangry.. my mate said he’d pop around and wanted to eat the soup for dinner, but hadn’t had a chance to make it, so we decided to go out, and have dinner, while he rolled a smoke, I thought I’d rather make something at home, I started cooking, put the rice in the cooker, then onions, spinach and tomatoes, to cook, I was going to add eggs to it, then I remembered, I had some food sent from home, sisters packed, which was not opened in the firdge, I asked my mate to cut it open and it was chicken 65 fried then sun dried by my sister, dear loving sister that I mentioned of earlier.

The food was finally ready, and my friend and I sat down to eat, turning the TV on. My balcony door was wide open since we had been going in and out while cooking. Before starting our meal, I wanted to shut the door because it was noisy outside. As I got up from the sofa to close it, I accidentally knocked over a plant pot I had moved aside earlier, spilling all the mud onto the floor just seconds before we were about to eat.

There wasn’t the slightest bit of anger or frustration about why this happened. I was glad to see my mind remained calm and didn’t throw a tantrum. All I wanted today was to come back from work, take a nap, work out, shower, offer Jumma, and have an early night. However, we’re guided by the events and things we attract in life, shaped by how we feel and what we project. Controlling the mind means controlling emotions and shaping your day. Failures, falls, and hardships are wasted only if you haven’t learned from them. Be the person who makes everyone around them feel lighter and happier.

Around the world today –

• World War 3 – The French foreign ministry has called on all visiting French nationals still in Iran to leave immediately amid fears that the Islamic Republic will attack Israel. (Telegraph)

• Russia still invading Ukraine deep into its third year, Ukraine receives the first F-16 fighter jets from NATO allies, a long-awaited move to help repel Russia’s invasion. (Bloomberg)

• Tensions ramp up in the Middle East, and retaliatory strikes between Israel and Iran and its allies have increased since a July 19 drone attack by Houthis in Tel Aviv.

3 things I felt grateful for today

• Grateful for the late but delicious quick-made dinner which was very very very tasty and enjoyed by my mate and I ..

• Grateful for a long day today but still standing still.

• Grateful to no plans for the weekend and will be looking forward to doing nothing..

What would it take for me and for you to be accountable for time this weekend? and wake up tomorrow morning 10 x times, bigger, thicker, stronger, more energetic, confident, happy, and wealthy, make it a workout in the morning, have a good workout, and everything to be fine with family, friends and everyone around, then have a relaxing, relaxing, relaxing, yet a productive day tomorrow and all negative patterns, please get removed..

Goodnight, good luck!

Ash Khaleem